Mike or the Don’s 10 Worst Sports Commercials

Last week, we had fun bringing you the 10 Greatest Sports Commercials! This week, we are doing the complete opposite.

There are tonnes of terrible sports commercials out there that try too hard to be funny, filled with puns and stuff that doesn’t make sense. Then there are those that leave you standing there, wondering where your brain cells went. Well, we sacrificed our IQs to go through and rank ALL of them. Ok, not all of them but the 10 worst sports commercials we could find.

Otherwise, Enjoy Yo’self!

#10 KFC. Walter Payton.

For 13 seasons, Walter Payton was one of the best NFL running backs for the Chicago Bears but this commercial was definitely filmed before Michael Jackson’s escapades. Just remember that grown men in short-shorts playing with young children in a field of daisies is a terrible mix, no matter who you are.

#9 Dominos. Wayne Gretzky.

Back in 1994, Wayne Gretsky delivered pizza straight to your door… in complete hockey gear. Were athletes back in the 90’s desperate for money or something? Maybe he lost a bet.

#8 Turkish Airlines.

This wouldn’t be Mike or the Don without another shot at Kobe Bryant and the Chef in this one does just that drawing first blood with the line, “Tastes a lot better if you scored that last shot.” It starts off well but quickly turns into a role swap where the Chef tries to play basketball and Kobe tries to cook fish. It ends with Kobe checking out the guy’s behind as he limps past. Judge for yourself.

#7 Diet Pepsi:

This commercial was filmed when Iron Mike Tyson was the undefeated champion in the world of boxing. He was wealthy, had no face tattoos, no rape allegations and had not start cannibalism yet. From this ad, we all should have seen that he was going to go nuts at some point in the near future. Now it’s too late.

#6 Beautymist. Joe Namath.

I cringed when I saw this. Former NFL quarterback, Joe Namath advertised for a product called Beautymist wearing a pair of women’s pantyhose. This is the same guy who called Tim Tebow, a publicity stunt. Hypocrite.

#5 Guitar Hero.

This collection of athletes (Michael Phelps, Alex Rodriguez and Tony Hawk) quickly ruins Bob Seger’s – Old Time Rock & Roll and then proceeds to destroy a perfectly good game. While I love me some Guitar Hero, this commercial is a little overboard for me. Everything is exaggerated and that lead singer has a really annoying face.

#4 Mr Submarine. Scottie Pippen.

Pip definitely didn’t get as much air time on the court and on TV compared to his other half. And he wasted the exposure on this horrible, horrible commercial for Mr Submarine. This advertisement awkwardly implements basketball and combines it with innuendos, just listen carefully. No one in their right mind would agree to doing this unless money was owed. *touchy subject*

#3 Camel Cigarettes.

There’s no question that this was an unhealthy commercial. Bob Porterfield died of lymphoma. Ferris Fain died of leukemia. Granny Hamner died of a heart attack and so did Jackie Jensen. I’m going to throw in Joe DiMaggio (lung cancer), just for good measure. Somebody should have told these guys to quit smoking instead of endorsing it. Whilst it doesn’t affect us today, it’s commercials like these that encourage youngsters to take up smoking and they’re suffering now because of it.

#2 Converse.

Filmed in 1986, the NBA stars of that era gathered to film this atrocious Converse ad that sent the company into a downward spiral. I’m not surprised Magic and Isaiah were involved but did Larry Bird and Kevin McHale really need to stoop to their level? Well at least they got title number 16 that year to make up for it!

#1 Pele. Erectile Dysfunction.

I really don’t have much to say about this except for the fact that one of the greatest football players in history RAISES awareness for men with erectile dysfunction. You can argue that he was only trying to help or his heart was in the right place. It is very HARD not to laugh though. Keep in mind: When the time COMES, there is nothing funny about erectile dysfunction.

But wait! There’s more! Since you guys have been such good readers, I have created a special bonus section for the ads that were just too horrible to rank. I had no idea where to put them so here they are.

#Bonus! Bathtub?

We are all victims after watching this. Dennis Rodman in a bathtub full of bubbles? Whoever wrote this thing should be fired. I still don’t know who Diana Pearl is…

#Bonus! First Cash Advance. Magic Johnson?

Ervin “Magic” Johnson let this company use his name to advertise for cash advances. First of all, he isn’t exactly endorsing the right message. Secondly, the guy who claims to have the same name makes a terrible pun whilst a compilation of him dunking is happening in the background.

#Bonus! Just for Men. Luis Figo.

This is a case of the famous football player making a poor decision to lend his name and face to a product (that only helps men as the name suggests). It’s a terrible concoction of acting, football and man problems. Who knows, maybe it actually works. Figo doesn’t seem to have many grey hairs.

Seen something that makes you want to claw your eyes out or hit your head, repeatedly against a wall? Share it with Mike or the Don in the comments section below!

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2 Responses to Mike or the Don’s 10 Worst Sports Commercials

  1. The Joe Namath one was the worst for me. I can’t even believe he did it. Wonder if he asked anyone close to him before he did it and they said “Yeah Joe, good idea”.

  2. Pingback: Friday Funnies – 5/4/2013 | Mike or The Don

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